How to Hack a Heartbreak by Kristin Rockaway

Author:Kristin Rockaway
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Graydon House Books
Published: 2019-05-22T15:14:59+00:00

17

On my way to the subway, I grabbed a slice of pizza from a hole-in-the-wall on Fulton Street. Despite what I’d told Alex, I actually was hungry. I just couldn’t stomach the thought of staying there, pretending I hadn’t overheard them discussing me like I was some sexual prize.

When I arrived home, Vanessa was sprawled on the couch, one hand clutching her phone, the other hand wrapped firmly around a bottle of rosé. As soon as I shut the door behind me, she asked, “Have you ever heard of this website called JerkAlert?”

My feet froze to the floor. “Um...yeah. How’d you find out about it?”

“It’s everywhere. Don’t you read BuzzFeed?”

“Right. Of course.”

“Anyway, there are some seriously messed-up guys out there.” Her thumb tapped and scrolled against her screen. “Including the guy I was supposed to go out with tonight.”

She held it up for me to see:

Name: Justin

Age: 29

Location: Williamsburg

Review: Our first date was going great until he asked to “fingerbang” me in the bar bathroom. When I told him no, he called me ugly, then ditched me with the bill.

“Oh my God,” I said.

“I canceled as soon as I saw the review.” Vanessa took a swig from her wine bottle. “Why didn’t Vilma know about this? She is so fired.”

It pleased me to know that JerkAlert was of more use to women on the New York City dating scene than an overpriced, overhyped matchmaker. So much for Whit’s claim that the site was purely about catharsis.

“You should demand your money back,” I said.

“Maybe.” She fiddled with her phone for another moment. “I looked up Ray, too.”

Not Ray. He seemed like such a nice guy, so genuinely kind and helpful. Not to mention, he had the keys to our apartment. What if he was sneaking into our rooms and rifling through our underwear drawers when we weren’t home?

Ugh.

“What does it say about him?” I asked.

“Nothing.” Her lips turned up in a coy little smile. “He’s not in there.”

“Wow.” I was shocked. Not because Ray’s reputation was clear, but because of the way Vanessa looked right now: totally lovestruck. “He is a great guy.”

“Yeah.” She took another swig of wine, not bothering to wipe the resulting dribble from her chin. “You were right about him.”

“I’m glad to hear you say that.”

“If he moved out of Bensonhurst, I would totally consider dating him.”

Vanessa may have been lovestruck, but she was still Vanessa.

“I suppose it is less than ideal that he’s still living with his mother,” I said.

“It’s bullshit.”

“Okay, but—”

“I mean, he’s pushing thirty. And I’ve discovered that being a building super pays surprisingly well, so it’s not like he can’t afford to move out on his own. Or in with a roommate. Or anywhere that isn’t under his mother’s roof.”

“Have you ever asked him why he lives there?”

“To ‘save money.’” She rolled her eyes, using sarcastic air quotes, as if saving money was a ridiculous notion. “He’s waiting until he gets married to move out. By then, he hopes to have enough for a down payment on a house.

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